Alternative New Years honours list

Here is my alternative New Years honours list

Teachers committed to their vocation and students that continue to creatively engage despite Goves ineptitude.
Checkout staff that don’t try to redirect you to the self service tills
Foodbank volunteers
The army of little old ladies that keep so many small charities, church’s, volunteer coffee shops, etc sustainable giving their time and talents freely and with such grace
Those working in the benefit system that choose to ignore directives to save money and penalise people, and help people get the support they need.
The people who pass you in the street with their eyes up and give a simple hello, good morning or hi to their fellow passer by.

The expectation is building

Pregnant with expectation, fear, joy, hope, trepidation. This advent may we find the balance we need to journey on.

The angels relayed a message of hope, they saturated it with their own light this advent what will your personality bring the story of hope?

This advent we know the nativity scene on the card may not match the reality but we can choose to be part of the social inclusion depicted

This advent we are reminded the wise men did not arrive at the stable but much later, continuing a story that stretches well beyond the crib

As Christ became one with humanity this advent may we know oneness with the creation.

As Christ became one with humanity this advent may we know oneness with one another.

As Christ became one with humanity this advent may we know oneness with our creator.

As Christ became one with humanity this advent may we know oneness with ourselves.

At advent when there’s no room at the inn, we may doubt our call but the reality of the situation means we must persevere till we find rest

Community isn’t dead it’s just different

Sociologically community has been defined as about shared interest or shared space. Over the years particularly for youth workers, Christians, activists, and in general society community has also become a word associated with closeness, sharing life, positive warm fuzziness etc. It is the demise of this type community that people often lament as gone, because they equate commitment with attendance, regularity, and cohesiveness.

At first I bought into this lamenting, but I have been observing a shift, and think that actually the sharing life aspects of community are not less prevalent than they were before but just different and in many ways more real, and perhaps more mature.

With the young people I work with, and the adults around the fringes of StreetSpace, I am beginning to see community emerge as an attitude that is carried by individuals, that whilst they may not share space very often, or share the same interests, there is recognition of a shared humanity. A commitment and attitude of support, openness, warm fuzziness and solidarity.

I wonder if post modern fragmentation is helping us mature as people, moving beyond a forced community that grows from shared space or interest, to an attitude of being community in the myriad of relationships you find yourself in. A greater openness and honesty that is fostered quickly and community grows from this (sometimes fleetingly but no less community) and where the need space and interest become secondary, rather than primary.

I think we have a lot learn form the type of community I see emerging and fading, ebbing and flowing amongst the young people and ourselves, and it would be too easy to underestimate its power, sacredness, and authenticity, because it no longer fits the old models.

Half way there

I have been trying to take time to do a simple advent reflection each day. So far I have
1 To prepare for the beginning of the new in advent we must also recognise the new to come is an end &reshaping of ALL we have known before.
2 At advent we prepare to be caught up in the dance towards the redemption & renewal of all things, on earth, in heaven & under the earth.
3 In advent we can choose to see, like the wise men the creators signs, and continue our journey towards redemption.
4 In advent we remember whilst Joseph may have been floored by confusion and angst at Mary’s news he accepted the journey ahead.
5 Those on the edge were open to the change coming, like the shepherds let us travel light this advent.
6 In advent Marys journey recalls our need to experience the restless discomfort of a journey that seeks to give birth to the new.

7 Zac the religious man, performing duties in the temple doubted, will we let our religion blur our vision of the kingdom coming this advent?

8 In advent a new equality was birthed at the stable, heaven joined earth, different strata of society, animals?&angels gathered in solidarity

9 The advent story is enriched by the diversity of culture through the Magi, this advent may we open to the voice of the other

10 The census was an exertion of control, and power, In advent we remember the subtle ways Jesus’ birth demonstrated resistance, and change.

11 The wise men approached Herod first to find the newborn king, this advent let us prepare for the upside down kingdom the baby introduced.

12 The angels announcement to Zachariah connected the past, present and future, this advent we remember we are caught up in the ongoing story.

Advent reflections

I have been trying to take time to do a simple advent reflection each day. So far I have
1 To prepare for the beginning of the new in advent we must also recognise the new to come is an end &reshaping of ALL we have known before.
2 At advent we prepare to be caught up in the dance towards the redemption & renewal of all things, on earth, in heaven & under the earth.
3 In advent we can choose to see, like the wise men the creators signs, and continue our journey towards redemption.
4 In advent we remember whilst Joseph may have been floored by confusion and angst at Mary’s news he accepted the journey ahead.
5 Those on the edge were open to the change coming, like the shepherds let us travel light this advent.
6 In advent Marys journey recalls our need to experience the restless discomfort of a journey that seeks to give birth to the new.

Lead us out of exile

It has been so encouraging to see the recent discussion on the role of women in the church sparked by the huge inequality highlighted in lack of women speakers as mainstream conferences. Jenny has a great post here that tracks the conversation and expands the issue.
However we recognise the representation is only part of the issue, and i want to suggest that the changes required run far deeper and may not be possible in the current paradigm. As father to two amazingly gifted daughters 6 and 16 I am always on the hunt for stuff to help them grow into the people they are called to be. I am so greatfull to know people like Jenny Baker and Sally Nash and other female leaders of great integrity, who I go to with questions and guide me to resources and books such as Maya Angelou that I can share together with my children. But there is massive lack of radical faith inspired feminist writing aimed at teens and younger girls or at least stuff I can find.

The recent discussions raises two issues for me, that are connected. The first which Jenny already highlights in her post, is the issue of mentoring and supporting young women into leadership roles. Again I think this is a paradigm issue, one of the strengths of the early feminist movement was its clarity in setting up alternative structures and spaces to the established systems. I would like to suggest that the emerging church has far more to offer my daughters and is already encouraging them towards fullness of life not because of a quota, but a commitment to inclusivity, different leadership approaches, and humanity. For example Cakeful our Sunday thing, is often led by our 6 year daughter, and recently she asked to lead a session around time, and asked for support from Tracey an adult in the group. Tracey was amazing she offered Indi a planning meeting mid week, despite a busy schedule sat down with her, and planned together, which simply made my daughter beam. Watching this process was truly emancipating for my daughter and myself. I believe it is this type of approach that if practiced consistently is the best hope for young women in the church but more that that the best hope for the church to be led from its self induced exile due it’s inherent sexism and lack of inclusivity at all levels. So the second issue (sticking my neck out here and more than a little nervous in saying this) is a call for the amazing female leaders I know and thousands I don’t, to embrace the new paradigm, to create alternative structures and spaces, radical resources and methods, that directly challenge the status quo, rupture the institutions, recapture the feminist agenda in the minds of young people, and lead not just other women but eventually the whole church out of exile.

Our best hope is not in playing by the rules of the dominant, where position, gender, wealth, and power dictate, but in embracing the upside down Kingdom, of powerlessness, servanthood and grace, and it is those who have experienced oppression of the powerful that have so much to offer.

Blogging therapy

I have to admit I am struggling. I have been ill now for a couple weeks, there isn’t that much wrong in the big scheme of things, bronchitis knocked me out first week and I have a weird cough and sickness that I haven’t been able to shift and I am frankly knackered and frustrated. I have tests that I am awaiting results for and high blood pressure but it isn’t anything major.

Work wise things could not have been going much better, yes I am ridiculously busy as always, but we have taken great steps forward locally and nationally. The doctor says rest, and stress but I am not the resting type and being away from work thinking about all the stuff I need to do, could do and want to do it pretty stressful. Relaxing is not a strongpoint, but I after two weeks illness then returning to work for a week, I have been signed off for a week, to recover, so trying to behave, and rest.

I love the practice of silence, prayer, listening, but ultimately this begins to spark ideas, and heads me towards work mode particularly after a couple of weeks. My usual way to relax is a walk, beech or kite flying, but I can’t do this stuff so am feeling a little sorry for myself and pretty pathetic. My mind has gone into overdrive, and the things I like, such as blogs, reading generally get me thinking mission, so I thought of a blog post in a bid to try and park this stuff, the anxiety, patheticness, restlessness, work thoughts.

I seem to go around in circles and the activist in me will not switch off so I start to reevaluate stuff, and I find myself thinking again about different options, most recently selling everything and checking out RVs on eBay yes I know this is not conducive to relaxing. It is not like I don’t reevaluate my life as I go, and the illness is giving me time to take stock, most the things floating around is stuff I have complimented before, but it is like on hyperdrive.

So here is my bid to park my brain for little while, a moaning blogpost, that is selfish, western, and individualistic in a world where I know there are people with issues far greater than mine.

I doubt it ….

I recall how at 18 still at college I worked nights in a printers, doing a social care course meant there was hospital bed in the tutor room to practice lifts etc. one week I had completed 2 nights and at 10am we sat down in class to watch a video I moved to the bed for a better view. My tutor woke me just before 4pm, they knew my situation and simply left me asleep, whilst extreme it was acts of kindness and compassion that got me through. The course cut me a lot of slack, gave me opportunities, and simply tried to understand. It is this lack of trying to understand, lack of compassion and basic humanity that gets to me about the current government and proposals

yesterday I asked Could the 16 year old me survive today….fleeing home today would I get support…. are there any local youth workers left I could run to…. with the erosion of EMA could I attend college… the option of working nights in the printers is gone as has so much of the manufacturing industry, the chance of another job to support myself with over a million other unemployed youth would be slim… would I even entertain the idea of Uni and all that debt in such bleak surroundings as a caravan… I doubt it…. If I did get as far a uni why would I need to return to my home area to give back what I wouldn’t have received in the first place….. and so how will cuts, stigmatisation of young people play out in the long run….

Could the 16 year old me survive today?

I wept this morning. I cried for young people who have been have been vicitimised, marginalised and oppressed by the governments response to the recession of cutting services, I cried with the young people who will continue to be the ones who suffer most as we enter economic recovery which the government wants to promote with further cuts. The latest government proposals on young people, demonstrate a society that has lost its way, a society of selfishness, greed and power.

I wept this morning as friends responded to my post on facebook about my own situation as a NEET (not in employment, education or training) 16 year old. I left home, not willingly, not out of choice but out of necessity after my father who had been sober for 5 years started to drink again. My sister helped, the state helped, I was not stigmatized, I had time to get my head together, I had time to start to find out who I really was, out of the shadow of my father, I survived, I flourished. As I write the tears start again for the young people I met this week on the streets who do not have the same opportunity I had, I see them in my minds eye and I am simply distraught at what the future holds if current government plans continue.

Out of the shadows of my childhood, I began to explore my vocation, and pathway into youthwork. Unsurprisingly I left school with no O’levels but at 17 I was accepted to do a further education City and Guilds course in Leisure and Recreation. A course I started late because it took a while to see if I could get a grant and benefit to live and study. I moved onto to do Social Care and an A level, with a student grant and working nights in a printers and the fabulous support of my sisters family who let me live in the caravan in the garden, I began to mature and come to terms with who I was. At 19 I thought I was ready, but quickly realized I needed to go to Uni if I was going to do the youth work stuff properly, and that meant I needed more grant support. At that time automatic vocational grants (the first to go) had been cut and I remember sitting around an appeals table in County Hall in Exeter explaining my case to a panel of 15 adults, and making a simple promise to come back to the county for at least a year once graduated to help other young people.

Two years later, JNC youthwork qualification in hand, I returned to my sisters garden to live in her shed (the caravan was rusted away) and make good the promise I made in County Hall. At 21 I established my first detached youth work project in Devon, I worked part time and received housing benefit that helped make ends meet. I remember the young people I worked with 23 years ago, I remember them coming to the shed (my house) to plan how to establish a youth centre for the area, I recall the youth centre that was built on the basis of these proposals, and I still hear occasional stories from my sister about the work in the town. For those of you who know me, you will be familiar with the rest of my story, my long history with Frontier Youth Trust. My first paid post working and living on a difficult estate in the Midlands as part of YFC,(which incidentally encouraged my dad to shake my hand before I left Devon as he thought I had a proper job!) It was on this estate where I met real need first hand in my neighbors and began to learn what it means to be real community from them. Leaving to work for Worth Unlimited, with a job brief to make it work or close it down, but who now do an amazing job under a great CEO in Tim Evans in so many difficult areas across the country. Then more recently into StreetSpace who now meet over 8000 young people a month on the edge a month. I recall these stories, not to say look at me but to simply ask would the 16 year old me survive today. Asking this simple question causes the tears to return again as I know the answer would be no. Tears of gratefulness to my sister’s family and to the state without who I would not have survived. So the tears of thanks turn to a weeping that flows freely for the 1000s of young people I still hear about as youth worker, who share elements of my story, or far worse circumstances, growing up in a society that has lost its way…